I must have sat there and stared at my dead laptop for a good 10 minutes. I kept thinking that it must just be playing a joke, but no joke. No more flashing blue light letting me know that I was not alone in my home. I did not realize how much I have come to depend on my blog friends for love and laughter, tears and entertainment. So know I am left disconnected and a little frazzled. So many fabulous posts were written in my head and, like so many things, lost there as well.
I am now in Edmonton staying with my friend Debbie, well in Beaumont. We just returned from watching The Holiday. You know you have a dear friend when they reach over and squeeze your shoulder because they know that the words being said once fell from your lips and remind you of a sad, sad time. As we were walking out I wrapped my arm around Deb and said I wanted to fall in Love (yes, Love should always be capitalized) again. She said "It is time". And that it is. Sometimes I wonder what is left of my belief in Love. The inscription on our wedding rings was 'Love Believing Always'. The believing always was very important for me ... he stopped believing, how sad for him. I believe when that brilliant man comes into my life I will be able to Love, and I will believe in its power ... I do believe in its power.
This trip to Edmonton feels so different. I am in such a fabulously different place. Day by day, became month by month, which became year by year ... and that is how we survive, that is how we thrive ... living in the moment.
Last night I had an open house. Before everyone started to come I just took a moment to be quite and to think about how much I love all the people that would be coming through my door. It was a wonderful night. My heart felt full. I am so very blessed. When the last guest left, I curled up on my couch, let the music fill my soul and cried ... some happy tears, some sad.
I may not get to blog much in the next while. I know that I will miss it and being connected with all of you.
I love you so much my friends. Peace, love, and laughter. Merry Christmas.
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- H
- I am doing my best to find the good things in my life and cherish them. I love deeply. I laugh hard (so hard I sometimes snort). I still dream and believe that dreams are meant to be followed. I try to depend on God. I have so much to learn. I hope.
2 comments:
Merry Christmas my Friend! You never showed "day by day, month by month..." You have always been a pillar of grace, diginity and inspiration. I am glad that you are ready for love again. You will be loved so TRULY this time---because you won't pick a non-believer ever again. Love you!
If you are open to it, LOVE will find you. Most likely when you are not looking...Believe.....
Love and big warm hugs
K8
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