Running down dunes to oatmeal ...

A week ago I was running down the most amazing sand dune mountains right on the coast of Ireland and today I find myself tucked into my mom's kitchen with my oatmeal. Finally able to listen to the CD I bought in Florence that made me start crying in combination with the art I was being changed by.
Once again I have so much to say and am lost with where to start and once again I will just let me heart talk as I think that is what I need right now.
It feels like it is walking a tightrope ... so high but so wobbly and unsure of its next step. I raced my third year with the Children's Wish Dragon Boat team this past weekend. And most important things first ... The cup came home again. Team one did an amazing job and so deserved the win. The team I raced with, team 2, fought so hard and had some races that left me feeling like I was going to die and that there was no better felling in the world. But as it was for everyone, the highlight of the weekend was meeting one of the wish families. Being able to touch the boys, two boys in one incredible family, and hear how their lives have been changed forever by their wishes ... my heart was squished. This family fosters and has adopted two kids with intense medical needs. They took the knowledge that they had learned from their child's medical needs as a gift and a resource that they needed to share. Inspiring and so moving. I only wish that all of you who gave so, so deeply from your hearts and wallets could have met this family. I will never be able to say Thank you for your support enough times. I am so proud of you.
And really the festival could not have been at a better time to remind me why I quite my job and am moving all the way across the country to start a new career. And every time that I start feeling overwhelmed or afraid I think of the kids and I am calmed.
I have mentioned a couple times that I have been feeling like some of my relationships are in the middle of a transition time. I have waffled between being at peace with this as I talk myself through how friendships are always changing. And being frozen in heartache because they are friendships that have been foundational and brilliant ... and my person. The battle between the heart and the mind. But I have to keep coming back to one of the great lessons I have learned in the past while ... to embrace change because fighting it exhausts you and, well, fighting change is like running up a massive hill of the silkiest sand really fast. It will take you forever to get to the top and in the process you have forever changed your mountain. And really if you turn around and you let yourself go and dig your heels in as you go faster and faster, giggling and screeching you may have the time of your life and find a field of perfect shells at the bottom that will take your breath away. So I will put my three lovingly chosen shells in places that I will see and feel everyday of my new life to remind me to keep loving and living the best that my little scared and beautiful heart can. To remind me of all the incredible people that have come to live in my heart because I opened it up and embraced change and to continue to be open to new friendships while always keeping enough room for the old ... in case they need room to grow again one day.