For the first time in forever I watched Amazing Home Makeover tonight. And as it always does it melted my sometimes tough little heart into a puddle.
I was remembering when Mike first left, when I was still in our place, in our room, in our bed I moved the TV into the bedroom. I balanced it on a couple rubbermade containers at the food of the room. I couldn't sleep or didn't want to sleep and so I watched hours and hours of TV and movies. And when this show would come on I would just cry and cry and cry. I think that it felt good to cry about someone else, to cry about something good and beautiful coming from something sad. I would feel so much deep compassion for the families and for all the people hurting and struggling to live.
I need moments like this to pull me back. I need to have my heart broken.
I don't know if it is like this for everyone. I have actually been thinking about that a lot this week. Wondering if everyone has to fight so very hard to keep open, to trust, to love and allow others to love them.
You know what I love about it here. It is February and I am being serenaded by the rain outside.
I move to Toronto tomorrow for my second internship. I am going to be living in a house right near Chris and Lisa with a classmate named Natalie. We laugh a lot together and I am sure that we will make some great memories.
Aside from a headache whenever I get on POF ... I have not caught anything yet. Really I have probably offended a number of the guys. Some of the profiles are so ridiculous I can not help but comment. I am not good at flirting at the best of times ... it just seems even more ridiculous online. I don't know. I need the Queen's help or I am so going to loose this 8 dates in 8 weeks thing. Natalie already has one in the bag. Hmmmmm .... help.
- H
- I am doing my best to find the good things in my life and cherish them. I love deeply. I laugh hard (so hard I sometimes snort). I still dream and believe that dreams are meant to be followed. I try to depend on God. I have so much to learn. I hope.
2 comments:
Okay. Your friend only has one down? No problem. You will be in Toronto. You will need to double up. Coffee counts. As I said earlier, you cannot go for quality in this little contest--it is just quantity. Remember, most of these guys think they are going to get laid on date one. You owe them nothing! If he has all his teeth and seems clean, date him! Doesn't matter if he is old, boring or even creepy--(just make sure you tell him you are on a student visa from the U.S. and are leaving next week) Odds are, you will meet at least one nice guy in these 8 weeks. He will not be the man of your dreams, but he will be nice. This is not about finding your lobster...this is about WINNING! Now get online and set up 2 dates by tomorrow night!
xxoo
QT
The Queen is so funny, but she is also right on! Get out there and score, well not really score just have coffee....as the queen says, coffee counts. Good luck. I am calling to the universe to send you only cute ones with all their hair and teeth. Hugs K8
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